If you are planning to break up with your girlfriend but still want to be a gentleman in her eyes, this article may be helpful for you. I know, breaking up is hard to do (or so said Neil Sedaka)… but sometimes it’s necessary. The secret to breaking up with anyone (and especially with girls) is to be fair, empathetic, courteous, and polite – not nasty, arrogant, or wildly emotional. You should always aim to end a relationship on good terms where possible. Keep on reading for our expert tips:

Relationship Breakup Tip 1 – Before you break up with your girlfriend, start cutting down the time you spend on her. A slow decrease in time will help in preparing her for a breakup. Drop a few hints here and there and talk about relationship and problems with her. Also reduce the total number of online chats, sms and video conversations you do with her. All this will make things easier for you after the breakup and will also help you to maintain a semi-positive image in her eyes.

Relationship Breakup Tip 2 – Tell her directly about the break up yourself. Do not involve your friends or her friends in this. It will drop your good image and create emotional turmoil too. Be honest and explain to her that it’s no longer working between you and her and that it’s time to move on. Answer any questions she has with dignity, empathy, logic (where necessary). Be direct in telling her that you don’t want to see her anymore – and why. If she asks for a reason, be prepared to offer one… but don’t go into each and every specific detail – e.g. “I don’t like the way you nag at me. And then you burn the toast! And your phone calls to Africa go for too long and cost me too much. And you don’t like the same pizzas I do.”

Relationship Breakup Tip 3 – Inform her about the break up at some place new for both of you. Breaking up at your place or her place is not a good idea at all. It will make her linger with break up after-effects for a long time – she’ll confuse herself with negative thoughts about the breakup and the happier moments you shared together at the same place.

Relationship Breakup Tip 4 – Help her to understand your way of seeing things, as best able. Once she understands you better as a person, she will better understand and respect your ‘breaking up’ decision too.

Relationship Breakup Tip 5 – If she wants you to reconsider your decision, but you are sure it is over, then be strong enough to tell her that it is your final decision. Holding onto things and being polite or weak with her will further encourage her to approach you.

Relationship Breakup Tip 6 – Plan for a comfortable timing to announce your decision in front of her, and be empathetic and aware of her emotional state at the time. Dumping someone during a tough phase of their life may make you appear a very cold hearted person.

Relationship Breakup Tip 7 – Be calm and handle her properly even if she cries in front of you. Be supportive but don’t get carried away with her emotions. Maintain your cool and stay rigid at your own decision. You’ve made a logical decision – so stick to it.

Relationship Breakup Tip 8 – Don’t get tempted to have “break up sex” as a way of saying goodbye to each other – ala “the last fling”. This will cause confusion for both of you, make recovering from the break up more difficult, and compromise the break up process. If you want to have sex together, you should be doing this during your relationship – not at the tail end, or afterwards.

No-one said breaking up is easy. But hopefully, by following these break up tips, you’ll be able to declare ‘I quit’ in front of her, yet still look like a decent person / gentleman. You can walk away holding your head high. And that’s important.